Ep77 Ari Galper - How to Win Clients Through Trust Without Chasing Leads or Overcoming Objections

Ari Galper  0:00  
You have to call someone to follow up with them. Then never use the word follow up. Here's what you say. Instead, I'm giving you a call to see if you have any feedback on our previous conversation, any feedback on proposal. You go backwards away from the sale, not forwards, trying to chase it. If you're in chase mode, in follow up mode, you're breaking trust just by being there in the first place.

Suzanne Taylor-King  0:24  
Hey, hey, welcome to a podcast where dreams meet determination and success is just around the corner. I'm your host, Suzanne Taylor King, and I'm here to help you unlock the full potential of your business and your life. Welcome to unlock your way with STK. Let's unlock your path to success together.

Suzanne Taylor-King  0:47  
Hello, hello, everyone. A little off schedule, unlock your way with STK on a Monday at 430 because of a very special guest I have from way across the other side of the world, the global leader in trust based selling Ari galper, welcome to unlock your way with STK, 

Ari Galper  1:15  
thank you so much. Excited to be here. Probably caught the accent. So I am originally from the US, but I live in Australia. Now live in Sydney. My wife on a dating site years ago, but do everything now virtually. So so far so good, wonderful.

Suzanne Taylor-King  1:29  
 What has it been like living on the other side of the world in a different season for 20 years?

Ari Galper  1:38  
Well, I have a lot of us clients, and I've got quite a few coaches who work with them. So I'm used to the US side, but it is quite kind of the way it used to be years ago. In the US is kind of quiet and peaceful to certain extent, except for things that happen here and there. But, yeah, smaller country, but definitely innovative and growing and trying to get ahead of the curve. So so far, I'm enjoying it. Yeah, it's great. I love it. I love it. Well, let's get into this today, because what you do, you have a new book and a new app that just came out all about trust based selling and selling through trust, and you're a big fan of building community, like I am, and this idea that trust really, especially in this age of AI and automated things, face to face, trusting relationship is really what, in my belief, really what grows a business to that Next Level. How did this get started for you? Well, you know something, I had a story that happened to me about two decades ago, 20 years ago. Company has been that long, but I'll share the experience you. I think people relate to it. I used to be a sales manager or software company, and we launched the first website, online tracking data, tools for website behavior like, how many people come to your website, how many page views? Now it's called Google Analytics. But back then, it was like a new product, and I managed 18 people underneath me, sales people at the time, and I got the phone calls from the website that were big opportunities. And one phone call came through, it picked the phone up, and the gentleman was represented a huge company in multiple websites around the world. It was like a big deal. He recognized the name of the business, and he was excited about our product, and we agreed to do a live demo and on a conference call that following Friday. So you can imagine, if I closed this one sale, it would double the revenue in one transaction. That's how big it was. So we were super excited. The day finally came. I'll never forget, at four o'clock in the afternoon, I'm in the conference room with my CEO. I closed door behind me, big, long conference table. You might remember the old days they had those old conference kind of phones look like Star Trek ships called poly con speaker phones. So I hit the speaker phone, dial tone comes up. I dial the number, and my guy picks it up. He's like, hey, Ari, how's it going? I said, Great, great. And he's like, let me, let us share with you who's in line with us today. I said, Right, I know someone else will be there. Next thing I hear is, my name is Richard, I'm CEO. I was like, Oh, this is good. My name is Mike. I'm Head of Global. It even better. This is Julia Hunter, global marketing. Amazing. Everybody on this call was a decision maker. It's gonna happen. It's gonna happen today. So I'd introduce myself, explain how our technology works, what we do. They had them log into a rudimentary kind of webinar tool back then to show them a live demo on one of the websites that we added some code to to help them see what it looks like to see real time, live data. So I'm we're all logging in. I'm describing how showing this all to them, and I started this noise on the phone call like, wow, it's great, amazing. They start asking me all kinds of questions, how does it work? How do we install it? There was so much chemistry on this phone.

Ari Galper  5:00  
Call Suzanne. It was like a love fest on the phone. You know I'm talking about, oh yeah,

Ari Galper  5:06  
they got the questions. You got the answers you're saying yourself. Oh my god, this is like no resistance, the perfect sales call. I was building relationships with them. I was being nice to them. I wasn't being aggressive, just being my normal self. An hour goes by, they're loving what they're saying, and my context is me. Ari, this is great. We love it. Look, give us a call a couple of weeks, follow up with us. I will move this thing forward. I was like, Oh, thank you. God, I got the high five back of my shoulder from my boss. He's like, nice job. So I said my goodbyes. I took my hand, reach for the speaker phone, hit the off button, and some reason for the speaker button, by complete accident, that was the divine intervention. I hit the mute button instead of the off button,

Ari Galper  5:51  
and a small click happened, and they thought I hung up the phone.

Ari Galper  5:56  
And that split second, a voice instead of me, said, Ari, go to the dark side. Be flying the wall. Go where no one's ever gone before in the world of selling. So I pulled my thumb back for a couple of seconds. They started talking amongst themselves, thinking I had left the call.

Ari Galper  6:09  
This is not a trick question, but what would you imagine they would have said after a call like that? What would you expect to have heard? 

Suzanne Taylor-King  6:16  
Uh, great things. Can't wait to buy this product. Can't wait to do this thing. Let's talk about it. 

Ari Galper  6:22  
That's what I was waiting to hear. But let me share with you what I heard verbatim, word for word, that brought us all here today. And here's what they said. They said we're not going to go with him. Keep using him for more information and make sure we shop someplace else cheaper, knife and heart twist. I was in a state of shock. Yeah, I snapped out of it, hit the off button, looked at the wall, and I said to myself, What did I do wrong? I was professional, I was competent. I was relationship oriented. I delivered value. I showed this solution. I showed testimonials. I did every single checklist that the sales gurus, the sales managers, been teaching us for years, were supposed to do to make the sale. Yet they lied to me. I said myself, what is going on here? This is a dysfunctional process between two parties, which is just all wrong. There's lying going on here. It's why the game. So I decided to finally break this cycle, because I went to the dark side, I came back for the light side. I said, Okay, gotta change. Then I launched my whole trust based selling approach and mindset, where our whole system and model and approach is based upon the idea of letting go, of focusing on the goal of the sale, and instead focusing on trust building only with the other person, not relationship building, yeah, but trust building the two separate concepts we'll talk about today. And by doing that, we built the whole body knowledge around trust based languaging, languishing, trust and a process called the one call sale, where one conversation with somebody, you can get to the truth, not the sale. If the truth is they're a fit, they become a client. That became our whole kind of movement, what I call trust movement, over the last couple decades.

Suzanne Taylor-King  8:19  
Well, I love what you said that there's a difference between relationship selling and trust based selling, because I noticed with most of the entrepreneurs I work with, there's a disconnect between the building relationships, and then all of a sudden you find yourself with a huge circle of friends, but nobody's buying from you, nobody's referring business to you. So they might like you, they might even trust you a little bit, but they're not sure of your competency level in what you're selling, or maybe even, and I've had this happen to me, not even sure of what I'm selling after many conversations. So I love that distinction. Could you unpack that a little bit? 

Ari Galper  9:11  
The irony of all this is they don't even have to like you, to trust you. It's like go to see a doctor, right? Doctor doesn't sort of have lunch with you first and hang out for coffee first get to know you,

Ari Galper  9:27  
but you truck them because they zero in on your problem at hello. So here's the difference, to clarify for your audience, relationship, real relationships with real people take a lot of time, and it starts the social structure, social norms. Let's become friends. Let's become peers. Let's get to know each other. Once we get to know each other, well, then maybe we'll work together. That's like a long time, yeah. So what I've figured out is, if you remove the relationship piece, you.

Ari Galper  10:00  
I only focus on the trust piece so you can pressure sales cycle down to a short amount of time and get to a yes or no quickly. See, we've been taught for years to, quote, build relationships pre sale.

Ari Galper  10:17  
Have a cup of coffee. Yeah, let's meet up. It becomes very social, and it's very hard to go to become the doctor to diagnose their problem, because they see you as a peer. The difference here is you have to become an authority with your potential lead at hello. You're the doctor. They're the patient. You have to know in your mind, what's the process to take them down, using trust based languaging to get to their truth, because the value of the conversation is not the value of a solution, it's the clarity on their problem.

Suzanne Taylor-King  10:49  
Wow,

Suzanne Taylor-King  10:53  
I just want to say that it makes so much sense from everything I've experienced in 40 years of being an entrepreneur, having different businesses, I think what is most intriguing is this idea of being the authority from Hello. It's all in how you frame those conversations. I think I talked with someone earlier today about how she was framing her get to know you discovery calls. And I said, Well, are they get to know you calls, or are they booking with you? You know, to explore hiring you? She said, I don't know. I said you got to fix that first.

Suzanne Taylor-King  11:43  
You know, you can't just hop on a call with anybody who wants to get to know you. I mean, this isn't social hour. We're here to do business. Right? What recommendations do you give for somebody in that situation where they're out there networking they want to get to know people. Want to get to know what they offer. But at the same time, we all need to grow our businesses and have paying clients. And how do we separate that get to know you nonsense with actual authority, building conversations?

Ari Galper  12:19  
Well, they have to first shift their mindset away from being solution centric. They have to shift to being problem centric. Their goal is that to get to know somebody. Their goal is to get to know the other person's problem. Yeah, that's a separation. You see when you're problem centric, you're like a heat seeking missile, looking for a problem, looking for a problem. You're not attempting to create chemistry and engagement and relationships. This is not dating. Okay? We are in a day. We are what I call the trust recession right now. Okay? No one trusts anyone, and the more social you are with somebody and Hello, the more they think it's fake, because they have no contact who you are. So here you are hitting nine. Oh, I love your shoes. Where are you from? They're like, Okay, what's she up to? So we are in a day and age now where, hello, you lose a sale, okay? Ed, hello, unless you're framing and your mindset is focused on a way to elegantly with bedside manner and empathy, get to their core problem, where they feel you're the authority and they need your help.

Suzanne Taylor-King  13:31  
Yeah, yeah, I see that. I don't know if you know this about me, but I was a dental hygienist before I became a coach, and I had instant authority because of my position, because of somebody scheduling an appointment with me and in the in the one minute from waiting room to my operatory, they trusted me to lay back in a chair and invite me into their body with sharp instruments. And I remember explaining that to someone and how quick that trust happened because of environment, because of the frame and because of my position. You know, that's who I was. So that came with a certain amount of trust. Do you think that's comparable to standing in your value as a coach, as a consultant, as a service provider? I think it's so so similar to show up in that prescription diagnosis space, rather than the friendly, you know,

Ari Galper  14:44  
space, yes, and you need a structure around that, and that's why my model called the one call sale process. And I'll give you some insights right now of how it works in real time, in real life, so your audience can start to use some of this. So let's say, for example, you. Get a lead, an opportunity, a LinkedIn opportunity, and there's sort of a fit, and they agree to a zoom call. Okay, this happens all day long with professionals, entrepreneurs. So usually when the Zoom call shows up and you show up with someone, it's like we feel this obligation to create this instant chemistry. Oh, how are you Nice to meet you. Howie, where you from? We do all this rapport building. We think that's what our job is to do, right? And then it kind of goes sideways and sideways, and finally you get to something at some point, which might be meaty, but then it's too late, because you already embedded the social structure. You lost your authority. So let me show you how what we teach all of our many clients. Okay? They show up on Zoom. First thing you say, is this nice to meet you? Nice to meet you as well. So first thing you say is, what you say next? If it's okay with you, Suzanne, if you wouldn't mind take a step back for a moment, maybe walk me through your background, your situation, and that's your current concerns you have with your business, and we'll go from there. Would that be okay with you taking things like this over your mouth like a doctor, sit back in your chair like a therapist like that. I love it. This trains you not to do what talk it to me, it's so hard at first, because we are so liar, to create chemistry, engagement, move them forward, get them to like us. They don't need to like you. They don't want to like they already have their own friends, nothing personal. I'm sure we're all wonderful people, but they're not there to meet a friend. They're there to solve a problem. You start the wrong direction. You've lost it at hello. So you sit back and notice the question I said, if it's okay with you, ask permission. You wouldn't mind maybe take a step back for a moment, walk them into your background situation and up to your current concerns you have. There's with your team. We'll go from there. Would that be okay with you? John? See this tells them right away, the call isn't about you. You're the doctor, if the call only about them, and what happens is they get permission now to download on you and tell you their whole story at hello. I love that. I love it. Where does it hurt?

Suzanne Taylor-King  17:17  
Such simplicity, but yet, really showing up as that person who's there to solve other people's problems, right?

Ari Galper  17:33  
Yeah, the mindset is, I'm not here to make to make the sale. Yeah, I'm here to see if your problem is serious enough to even dress in the first place. Because maybe it's not. Maybe you need some aspirin, and you're out of here. You don't need to go to pharmacists, right? So every day, many times, entrepreneurs become the pharmacist and the doctor all in one on the call and destroy everything, and they gotta start chasing someone because they hear at the end of the call. I want to think about it. I'm not ready yet. Call me next Wednesday. You end up chasing people, and your pipeline is big, but your conversion is low.

Suzanne Taylor-King  18:15  
And what about the where does that leave the whole nonsense with overcoming objections, because

Ari Galper  18:25  
there are no objections if you start the process from Hello the right way. The reason why objections come between the conversations is because you've allowed openings for them not to trust you. Their responsibility is on you, the person on the side, not them. Objections disappear when you start the process like the doctor from the beginning, because they can trust you, because they see you're only focused on them. You're not talking about you. They go, Oh my God, she's not even talking about trying so many things. She's just actually spending time with me and my boy. Time with me and my problem. I think she's okay. No objections, zero. I know it's hard. A lot of your ideas are very

Suzanne Taylor-King  19:15  
I totally believe it, because I've seen it happen over and over. But where, how many times did you screw this up to to really understand this model for yourself?

Ari Galper  19:32  
Look this is this after 20 years as an art form now, and it can be learned quickly, okay, like four sessions, but the con, but it's the real challenge is the mindset of the other person. They let go of all their voice and the conditioning saying they got to like you, you got to engage, you got to add value. What I tell my clients is stop adding and giving value. Value in itself, has been commoditized. They don't need to hear about your. You. They don't care about you, nothing personal. What they care about are your ability to go do a deep dive, what I call down the iceberg inside their world, unpack their problem and show them the severity of it, the seriousness of it, and ask this final question, is this a priority for you to address for his law once and for all, or somebody prefer not to deal with at the moment. I'm okay either way. What that says is, it's not my problem, it's yours. Yeah, I'm the adult. You're the child. You want to solve your own problem or not, I'm not gonna take under my shoulders because you have it. I'm not gonna own it. You got to own it. And you tell me if you want to dress or not, if you do, but I'll walk you through a road map for how to fix it. See, I'm the doctor now, saying, hey, look, your shoulder injury is pretty serious, but you gotta do some exercises, like exercises not gonna you're not gonna get better. It's the same conversation, but you do it nicely and sweetly and softly, like with bedside manner,

Suzanne Taylor-King  21:01  
yeah, yeah, and I can see where the prescription that you're offering is much more trusted because of that framing, but also the gift of the space of someone else talking about their problems, and you know what they need solved, I think you would actually end up with more committed clients, wouldn't you? I mean, it is people who actually want to do the work and want to solve their problems and want to work with somebody on that, rather than dragging somebody along with you or chasing somebody to follow up with them.

Ari Galper  21:53  
The worst thing to do is, ever follow up or chase somebody? Ever and if you have to follow up with someone, let me give you a tip right now. Okay, if you have to call someone to follow up with them, then never use the word follow up. That's the worst word to ever use. Like, your sit forever. It's like, like sales, one on one. Here's what you say. Instead, I'm giving you a call to see if you have any feedback on our previous conversation. Any feedback on proposal, any feedback on the meeting we had. You go backwards away from the sale, not forwards trying to chase it. If you're in Kate's mode and follow up mode, you're breaking trust just by being there in the first place. Nobody wants to be pursued.

Suzanne Taylor-King  22:38  
Why do you why do you think you know, it's gotten so much worse since social media because of access to people. Do you think?

Ari Galper  22:52  
Well, I think people in general are, are so fragmented and skeptic right now, they can't even think past tomorrow. They're so in the moment with the phones and texts and social media and you we need to have some cut through. We got to stop them in their tracks. And we're now living a commoditized world where almost every business is commoditized. An insurance guy and Coach Coach, you just can't say, Hey, I'm different. So what I realized, the only way to cut through the noise in this day and age now is to have a unique approach itself. Not your solution is unique, but the way you handle them is unique. It's a trust based approach. If you can build trust with people in this way, you've now become an I call a category of one. They go, Oh my God, she's so different. He's so different. They don't really care about how you solve their problem. All they care about is, can I trust you to be the one to solve it? That's the strange people understand. They think, oh, I'm looking for a coach. Oh, great. Let me tell you what I do. You really think they care about what you do? They know you do. They tell your website, it's not a mystery. You're a coach. They get it. They don't. But see that triggers us. Start to do start flexing. Oh yeah, let me tell you what. See, you have to be careful to be seduced in that, because you'll be seduced and go, Oh, they want to hear about me. It's not about you. We got to let that go and be less and be calm, centered, understand your positioning. Don't make any assumptions. That's because they said they want this medicine. They may not even need it. You have to question their need for their own need, and that blows their mind. Oh, 110%

Suzanne Taylor-King  24:38  
and I want to unpack that a little bit because I think ethics and morals and all of the trust worthy things come into play here. Recently, someone wanted to hire me full rate one on one referred to me seem like a golden opportunity. Money until we got into the actual conversation, and he wasn't making any money. He had spent hundreds of 1000s of dollars trying to have a business in the last three years, and was desperate. I need a client this week. Can you help me? And I said, No, no, I can't. The best advice I could give you is to get a job and build your business on the side over the next two or three years. Well, the look on this poor woman's face was just what, that's what no one else was willing to say that to her. And it took a little bit, but after she thought about it, she sent me a very nice email and said, Thank you for telling me what no one else was willing to tell me. It's time for me to have an income and then build my business the way it should be, built on trust and quality, rather than panic and desperation. But three people before me were not willing to say that because they saw a hot prospect, they weren't focused on the truth, and you were Yes, yes. And do you see that as a common struggle for people to get past when they're looking to you know, embrace some of the things that you teach? Do you? Do you find that that's a big obstacle for them? Yeah? Because where

Ari Galper  26:44  
they struggle is they've been so conditioned to focus on selling themselves, yeah, doing pre consulting, adding value, sending PDFs, sending proposals. They're so regimented with a with a practice which is now extinct, they don't know how to transition to a trust based space. Now, when I say trust, people go, Oh, Ari, I'm build relationships with people. I can build trust. I'm like, no relationship building is not what I'm talking about here. It's a new skill set. I did a talk recently at UCLA, their CEO forum, and I told this the CEOs. I said, the first thing you have to do is tell your sales team to stop selling like a what they have to learn a replacement skill called trust building, because trust building will grow your business, not selling, you'll be burning through leads, chasing leads, getting you need more nor more marketing. You're burning your opportunities. I wish I had a call kind of like yours. I had an inbound opportunity ahead of sales with a big sales team, and he's like, ah, we love your material. We love your philosophy. Can you come in and give us, give us an inspirational talk, like, what's the problem you want to solve? Oh, and we're having a great year. Want to just come in and teach us some of your great stuff. And, and I said, but what's the problem you want to solve? Oh, no, no. We just want you to come in and, you know, we're doing great. Just give us as to what. Because I'm the Doctor, I'm not inspired by getting my ego, I want to know what the problem he goes, and I said, let me ask you a question, how many opportunities a month are coming to your business? He goes, we have about 100 leads a month. How many of those leads have been diverted to a new client? He said, 25 I said, What happened to the other 75 Why don't we work on that? We can double your business by just fixing the 25 to 50 with just a short amount of time. He's like, Oh, you can fix that. That's your problem. You can't even see yourself. Wow, you're right. And that's what I'm trying to say, is I'm not gonna be seduced by saying, Oh, they love me. I only want to work with somebody who's open to the truth of their own situation. It's like my daddy was a therapist. The best patients he worked with were the ones who lived their truth and asked for help. So if you're not in that state of mind, you're not gonna get over the edge on this thing.

Suzanne Taylor-King  29:20  
Yeah, well, there's such a raw honesty there, right? And your your position in that moment, you put your ego aside and and didn't allow, oh, Ari, you're great, and we love your stuff and we love your material. Just come and motivate us now, most would be flattered, and most would be like, Oh, okay, a paid speaking opportunity, great. But what you did in that moment by getting to the problem now you're coming in to give a talk. Talk that has meaning and so much more value, even if the talk was exactly the same. So much more value because they know why you're there. Huge raw

Ari Galper  30:19  
honesty equals respect. Yeah, respect equals trust. That's the formula. You can't be bold with someone. You can't be a doctor with them. You can't help them see the truth behind their actual problem. If you can't help them get what I call the COI cost of an action, what's a cost them not to solve their problem? Then you're going to be stuck Chasing Ghosts forever.

Suzanne Taylor-King  30:43  
Wow, all right. Number one recommendation for a solopreneur who has all these relationships, all these potential referral partners, connections. What's the number one thing they need to start doing right now?

Ari Galper  31:09  
Make a list of the top three core problems that you help your ideal client solve. Gotta write those down. Yes, then marketing wise. So there's two parts to the process to grow a business. One is lead generation. One is conversion. Okay, we talked about today, mostly was a bit of a conversion process. Once you get someone to an actual call, and there's more behind it, obviously the system behind that. But then there's the marketing side, what you're talking about, which is like floating around the ecosystem, hoping the apples will fall off the tree, kind of model, which a lot of businesses do. They cans networking meeting, and they go to, you know, do all those things, and they hope somehow business will just kind of pass, let

Suzanne Taylor-King  31:53  
me pass out my business card. You hope somebody calls me? Yeah, yeah.

Ari Galper  31:57  
Don't be doing that. So here's what, how you change that you be. And here's the shift, you start to market the problems that you solve. You're doing a market yourself. So let's just say you're a financial advisor, and you go to networking meeting, you meet somebody, they say, What do you do? Normally it say, you'd say, Oh, I'm a financial advisor, and I hope you retire like eyes roll right. Here's what you say. Instead, I'm a financial doctor, and you smile like what, I help business owners solve three problems. Make sure when they exit, the exit without overpaying the taxes. Number two, make sure that their staffs. You know, you list the problems out that you solve. You don't talk about what you do. It's not about you and your solution. It's the problems. The more clarity you have on the problems that you solve that trash people do you and go, Oh, I've got, I'm interested in that. How do you do that? Now you're engaged around the problem. So the big idea here is market. The problems that you solve not your solutions. Solutions have been commoditized. They're just noise. Everyone else sells what you do. Sorry, that's just the real world. I can type in what you do right now on Google and find other people on LinkedIn who do what you do, and me too. I'm not saying I'm unique. I'm just trying to say that's the reality where we live in it. So unless you differentiate your approach to market, you're not going to make it agreed.

Suzanne Taylor-King  33:32  
What do you think is the struggle in that? You know? So when I talk about the problems I solve versus some other business coach, I think the problems I solve are pretty darn important, and so does that other business coach, but we get kind of lumped in when you call yourself a business coach. You know, it's about scaling. It's about growth. It's about more leads.

Ari Galper  34:05  
Or first thing I agree with, I would not use the word coach ever again. Yes, I use word Business Growth advisor, perfect. That says growth and people want growth. Coach is just like a generic term which has no nothing in it. That's that's exciting. So I would reframe your positioning title in a way that tells the market what you do in three words, I'm a Business Growth advisor. They kind of get that. She helps businesses grow. A coach is like, Well, I gotta think about money. It is. It's couple more leaps to get there. So a lot of it is positioning, the languaging around you. It's also a lot about making sure that you've you're crystal clear on the words that you use that address the issues that they know they have, but aren't conscious of you. Hmm, gotta go behind their thinking. This is why we have this or what we have this language track that goes what I call down the iceberg on that first meeting to unpack and peel the onion back behind their problem. Because at first, the potential leads don't even know what their problem is. They might say, I'm beneath for a couch, but they can't even explain, like, you know, I'm talking about, like, yes, they say the problems X, turns out it's y, you know, it's like, what? Because they don't trust you enough to open up, to be vulnerable with you at Hello, to say what truth is, my wife is upset with me. I'm coming. I'm overweight. My business is on top of me. I can't get we're not gonna just open up. Shoot, no, I'm becoming a friend,

Suzanne Taylor-King  35:43  
no, and I can honestly say that the problem behind the problem is typically the problem. And I can't tell you how many times the business model is the problem, they've chosen the wrong pricing model or business model or delivery model based on the size of their audience. And you know that conversation is a tough conversation when you know somebody is expecting to have a really incredible income from selling a $297 course, but they only have 100 people on their email list, and I have to have that conversation that's a hard like slap in the face conversation of radical honesty. And I'm not afraid to have it anymore, because it's happened so many times where people have chosen a business model that doesn't support their income goals. Or, you know, if you have a small audience, we have to build the audience before you can sell something low ticket, like just the common sense of numbers, to me is very, very difficult conversation and my homework, and I'm curious whether you find this a lot is, is I had to work on my confidence, my clarity, my conviction in what I believe and what I do. And maybe some people don't agree with it, and I'm okay with that, but when I give that prescription, the diagnosis and then the prescription, there's ultimate confidence, just like when I was a dental hygienist and doing it for my patients, you know, 18 years ago, I think that's the biggest hurdle for entrepreneurs, is that internal embodiment of who they are and what they do, and the confidence in their solution.

Ari Galper  37:44  
And let me challenge you. Let me challenge you on that because use the word confidence, yeah. And the the switch here is you don't have to be confident about your solution. You have to be confident about the problems that you solve. It's a shift, because everyone believes what they do is great and and, you know, I don't want you to be pure people selling with more confidence. I want them being more confident and knowing more than their prospect knows about themselves. That's where you get bold and confident when you can say, Look, your actual problem is this. Let me tell you, because you're in your example, because you're in a high volume low margin business, which is not you probably want a low volume high margin business, is that, right? Johnny, yeah, that's what I want. That's what you're not seeing. See, I'm taking your here. Lee, you told me changing his thinking going you're just seeing it the wrong way. I said that my solution is just helping them see things in a different way. That's the confidence you have to have understanding your market well enough that you know them better than they know themselves beautifully.

Suzanne Taylor-King  39:01  
Said, Do you think that with information the way it is today? AI, YouTube, all the information in the world is available out there, right there, right? People need to change their thinking, and that's our job, to shift someone else's thinking

Ari Galper  39:31  
totally just think about it. If there's no behavior change, nothing happens. You don't get paid. They don't get resolved. So there's two steps that have to happen. First one is you have to shift their mindset, shift their thinking, from how they see things right now to the truth or actual problem. That's your first step. Then you got to ask them, do are you committed to wanting to fix this or not? They go, you're right. I got to. Get out of this, then they're committed to behavior change. You cannot expect them to pay you for your services and make a change unless you change their mindset first, and they see that you understand them better. They understand themselves. Yes, that's what therapists do. They go right into Harvey. You're like, Oh, you got me. You own me. You know me.

Suzanne Taylor-King  40:24  
I'm vulnerable. Yeah. And do you think those that are better at this or more apt to this way of being that we're talking about have actually been through the journey themselves. You know, I think when, when I see people who are really good at what they do, it's because their ideal client has problems that were their problem, and they figured out how to solve it, or they learned how to solve it, or they worked with somebody else to solve it, and being just, you know, five minutes, 20 minutes ahead of your ideal client, really helps me as an entrepreneur. I know my entrepreneur clients so so well, and I think that's what you're saying. Like, be in love with your clients problems because you once had them too.

Ari Galper  41:30  
Fall out of love with your solution, yes, or fall in love with their problems.

Suzanne Taylor-King  41:36  
Yes. It's not about your offer or your PDF.

Ari Galper  41:40  
Where about what you do. They it's not a mystery, like they get it. It's not even LinkedIn. It's not your website. You're 8x Whoopie. You're a commodity. You're not gonna win. Saying, Oh, I'm different. Are you kidding me? No, you gotta be different in your approach with trust building with them this way, it's the only way that's left.

Suzanne Taylor-King  42:06  
Yeah. Well, I'm laughing because I have learned when I first came into the online space, every person that I either tried to learn from or work with. It was, you know, the high ticket, high pressure sales and overcoming objections, and, oh my gosh, I just I tried to force myself into what I thought was required. And and it was just horrendous for me. And I had a conversation with someone, and it was all about the free thing I was giving away online. You know, the freebie, the opt in, and they hated what I was giving away. And they just said, why don't you give away something else? And I said, Gosh, I should just give away everything, because it's not about the freebie. And all of a sudden, I sat back, and I was just like, it's not, it's not about your opt in or the thing you give away in exchange for somebody's email address. Nobody wants that, and if somebody takes it from you, it's just going to sit in a folder on their computer. It's not going to lead to business. Very, very rarely, unless you don't skip this step that we're talking about today. Well, Said, I just appreciate what I know we've never met before, before this conversation, which everybody's going to be really surprised, but your approach, your your book, and you have a new book coming out, tell us a little bit about the new book and the app, sure.

Ari Galper  44:09  
So my latest book is called trust in a split second, and it talks all about this and how to get your head around this concept. You can get a free copy at the trust book.com just like it sounds, not that complicated the trust book.com you can order a copy for free. It's going to be sent you in the mail. No digital delivery, sorry. Mail in your hand. Mail to you. We'll cover postage. You can schedule a time with us if you like, to chat with us as well about your situation. But that's that getting that book is probably your first start to really shift your thinking. But also, we just launched our new community and learning hub called selling the trust. It's in the Apple Store and the Google store. You can get directly from your phone just search selling the trust in the in the App Store. Download it. Join inside there is a global membership we're building of trust based business owners around the world. We're going to have different chapters in different cities around the world, chapter leaders we call trust based leaders, who will be teaching and helping other businesses with this concept. Inside the community will be a lot there's a lot of posts in there about latest techniques and ideas, success stories, community of people doing business together. It's the only network community in the world of trust based business owners. It's growing every day, and it's free to join. So again, you can go to the App Store or go to Ari galper.com/app

Suzanne Taylor-King  45:38  
if you want. I'm so excited Ari, if you're looking for somebody in the Philadelphia area to put an event together for your world, you just let me know. Please join up. Let us know for sure. Yeah, I love this so much. It's so in alignment with who I am and what I do. And anybody who knows me will say that this so resonates with my brand, my community, the people I've brought together who are all helping each other grow and supporting each other, whether it's a coaching group I run, or just the community that I run on Facebook, or, you know, my private community. And so I really whatever I can do to support your message. You just let me know. I'm going to share all the links from your book and the app here in the comments, and I'm I'm going to put your book on the list for my book club in my community, because I think this is a must do for anyone who has their own business. So thank you so much for today, and appreciate what you do in the world pleasure. Thank you so much for having me. You're so welcome. You're so welcome. Everyone. Follow Ari on LinkedIn. I'm going to share all his links below, and please download the app from the App Store. You're going to see me there. I'm going to do it right now after this call, super excited. And thank you again. Look forward to more conversations. Ari likewise, have a great day, everyone. Thank you for tuning in to another empowering episode of unlock your way. I hope you found today's discussion inspiring and you're ready to take your business and personal growth to that next level. If you're feeling as fired up as I am and eager to unlock that full potential, I'm here to help you on your journey and provide that personalized guidance tailored to your unique goals and challenges, simply book a one on one coaching call with me, and we'll dive deep into your business aspirations and see how we could co create a roadmap for your success, and whether you're striving to scale an enterprise or just getting started, I'm here to support you Every step of the way to schedule your coaching call, simply visit the website at unlock your way with stk.com click on the book a call button, and we'll turn your dreams into that reality. Subscribe and review on your favorite podcast platform and on YouTube. Plus, you can join over 800 entrepreneurs in the IDEA Lab Facebook group. Let's make success as an entrepreneur happen together until next time I'm SDK, keep dreaming big. Stay focused, and most of all, have fun while you're doing it.

Speaker 1  48:46  
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